Take Control Of Your Thoughts
The other day, my mom sent me an e-mail filled with funny excerpts from real trial transcripts. Many of them made me laugh out loud—like this one:
Attorney: Now doctor, “isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?”
Witness: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
When Mom and I talked about the excerpts, she zeroed in on this one:
Attorney: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
Witness: Yes.
Attorney: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
Witness: I forget.
Attorney: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
Unfortunately, Mom didn’t want to talk about how funny this was. She wanted to talk about myasthenia gravis.
She asked me if I remembered when an ophthalmologist misdiagnosed my step-dad with the illness and scared both him and my mom nearly to death because they were sure he was doomed. I said I did. In spite of that, she went on to tell me the story as if I didn’t know it. Luckily, I was weeding through my e-mail while she did, so I didn’t get drawn into her angry story. If I’d had a remote control that had any influence over her, I would have pushed the mute button … or better yet changed the channel.
Obviously, we don’t have control pads for the people in our lives. We do, though, have a control pad for ourselves.
I used to go around saying, “It pushed my button,” or “She pushes my buttons.”
I had no idea how ridiculous that was, as if everyone and everything else in the world had a remote control that was the boss of me. Of course, now that I understand law of attraction, I know that if my buttons get pushed, I’m the one pushing them.
Be Kind When You Rewind
When I listened to my mother the other day, I thought about how often we push the rewind button on our control pad. It’s like we have this compulsion to weed through the extraordinary amount of sensory input and information we get each day to find the one thing that compels us to rewind into the past and dredge up some old resentment or disappointment.
Here I was with my mother laughin,. and she decided to hook in on the two words in the probably 400 or more that were in that e-mail of funny attorney missteps. She pushed the rewind button and … whirrrrr … she was back in the past in an unpleasant experience.
It was such a jarring shift in energy to witness that it really got my attention. How often do I hit the rewind button?
Even though I know how law of attraction works, I still hit that button from time to time.
I’m learning, though, and contrast such as I experienced with my Mom reminds me to be kind when I rewind. I only want to rewind when I’m rewinding to some triumph or feel-good moment that helps me amp up my now frequency.
Hang Onto That Control
The truth is that we get to hog the remote when it comes to how we focus. We can mute, change the channel, turn the volume up or down, freeze the image, fast forward, or go in reverse.
If you think of your focus in terms of this kind of control, it makes it a little easier to stay on top of how you use your thought. Next time you find your mind wandering off in a negative direction, try imagining a nice big remote control with colorful buttons. Consciously push a virtual button that will take your thoughts in a better direction.
Me? I’m rather enjoying the “volume up” button. I keep turning up the volume on thoughts of how successful I’ve already become.
Remember, no one can take that remote away from you. You push your own buttons. So push the ones that will serve you.
Related Posts:
Leave Behind Past Misalignment
Photo by Ronier on Flickr.
Tags: control your thoughts, focus thought, Law of Attraction
September 7th, 2010 at 12:03 pm
Beautifully worded, Ande. Thanks for this reminder. Love the remote control analogy.
Even in the context of the Abraham-Hicks video meetings that Mark and I hold, folks will sometimes begin to relate an anecdote of some sort and their account will suddenly take a nosedive into a bad-feeling place of a myriad of negative details and sorry memories. It happens. But thankfully we can always personally fast-forward out of that sort of imagery. We each have our own remote and the ability to push our own buttons.
Karen´s last blog ..Bridging the Gap
September 7th, 2010 at 1:29 pm
I love the analogy to a TV Remote control. Much of what you said resonated with my own experiences. Like you, I’m getting better about trying to just rewind to the good thoughts and experiences of my past. I guess that practicing is the way to get better at it.
I especially like the thought of the “MUTE” button when someone we love starts rewinding to the negative past thoughts. I find that when someone I love starts I will ask, “does this make you feel good or bad talking about this?” It stops them in their tracks. Those who don’t understand “Law of Attraction” will get angrier and say, “WHAT DO YOU THINK?” But I just respond quietly, “Well how do you WANT to feel?” It helps me to not be dragged into their quagmire.
September 7th, 2010 at 3:28 pm
That’s a really good approach, Julia. I want to do more of that.
Karen´s last blog ..Bridging the Gap
September 7th, 2010 at 4:10 pm
Thanks, Karen and Julia! Yes, the fast forward button and mute buttons work great. I use the same strategy, Julia, especially for my mother. I’ll ask her, when she’s on a rampage of anti-appreciation, “Is this making you feel good?” And often, she’ll say, in the same tone of voice five year olds use when challenged, “YES IT DOES.” LOL But often, when you ask that question, it does create an opening for a new direction.
September 7th, 2010 at 4:29 pm
LOL, Ande. My mom would have said it just like that, too.
Karen´s last blog ..Bridging the Gap
September 8th, 2010 at 1:38 am
Brilliant …. Ande, Karen and Julia
September 8th, 2010 at 7:29 am
I just stumbled onto your blog via Coach Tia’s blog. I, too, love the analogy of the remote control. I’ve used a technique that is similar to the remote control’s channel up or down buttons. My father is addicted to anger and every time I talk to him he reverts to the same three subjects; one goes back 35 years. We’ll be talking and out of the blue he’ll change the subject (channel) to these subjects that fill him with anger.
Guess what? I just discovered that I have a remote, too. Now I change the channel to a subject that has neutral or positive emotions for both of us. I spent so much time trying to change him; to make him see his subjects from different perspectives. I finally changed me. I finally figured out to do just what he does and change the subject.
These days, instead of every visit or phone conversation ending in an argument, we are amicable instead of angry with each other.
September 8th, 2010 at 12:48 pm
Hi Berta–welcome to the blog. Thanks for your comment! Your story is a great example of taking control. I love this: “I spent so much time trying to change him; to make him see his subjects from different perspectives. I finally changed me.” That’s the key to it all, isn’t it? We waste so much time trying to change what’s around us instead of focusing on what we CAN change–our thoughts.