The Secret Is Wags

One more bit of wisdom from my friend, Melanie, the distance healer:

When she and I spoke the other day, she told me she thought much of our problems in manifesting what we want lay in our desire to make things unfold in a specific way.  In other words, we try and manhandle the details.

We want to orchestrate how things unfold down to the nitty-gritty minutia of it all.  Author Neville, who wrote The Neville Reader, a law of attraction primer that was way ahead of The Secret, said that our job is to decide what we want and then feel as if it has already happened.

It’s that simple.  We just need to live FROM what we want, not INTO what we want. We get hung up, he said, when we try and figure out how it’s all going to come together.

We are not responsible for the details.  That’s the Universe’s job.  All we have to do is hold a vision of what we want and stay in alignment with our inner being, our Nonphysical self, so we can vibrate on a match with our desire.

This is what I’ve failed to do for some time.  I’ve gotten caught up in the details.

I want to feel financial freedom, creative success, joy, and security.  Instead of just finding ways to feel those things now, I’ve been trying to figure out how to get them, and I’ve been glomming onto Tim’s vision of winning the lottery and agonizing over it.  Or I’ve been deciding the way to get money is with freelancing and then agonizing over it.

No more.

I am delighted by the money I currently have.  I am enjoying my days as they are.  And I want to expand on that and feel riches and joy.

It can come to me in whatever way is best for me.

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The following is a story about Melanie Greer Deason’s beloved cat.  It’s such a wonderful story of the power of Spirit within us that I asked Melanie if I could share it with you.  She agreed:

“In August, my oldest cat Angel went over Rainbow’s Bridge, but we managed to be together those last days.  I awoke one morning, and Spirit said, “Take Angel to Roswell!”  I laid in bed arguing with the thought, “But it’s a four hour ride, and she hates the cat carrier, and it’s too hot without air conditioning, and. . .”  But that voice wouldn’t quit:  “Take Angel to Roswell!”  So, I waited until the afternoon, when there was cloud cover, and put Angel in the cat carrier – long enough to get her out to the VW.  I got in with her, started the engine, and opened the cat carrier door.  She immediately went over to my lap, curled up and purred.  Off we went, cruising down the old highways, using the manual crank window for air.  Half-way there, I propped her up on a pillow – high on my boxes of tools and such in the back seat, so she could be cooler and see out, while cars whizzed by us and her long grey hair tossed in the breeze.  We must have been a sight.

“In Roswell, Angel adapted to the house and continued sleeping on my bed, and was good about using her litter box.  At night, she was by my side or on my pillow.  As always, she’d reach out to kneed at my face, so I’d put her front paws in the palm of my hand and close my four fingers over hers – and together we’d fall asleep.  One night I felt her ribs and wondered, “How long can she last – she’s so thin?  Maybe I should talk to a vet about helping her over . . . when we get home.”  Two nights later I brought dinner to her and found she’d crossed over.  Just hours earlier, I’d checked in, kissed her head, and went back to working on the house. Since the violet crepe magnolia in my front yard was in full bloom, I put some flower cuttings into a vase to mark Angel’s resting place. She’s now planted in a corner of the back yard – with a young tree growing nearby.

“I listened to Spirit that hot summer day, as I did years eighteen years prior:  I was driving in town when a voice inside said, “Turn in – NOW!”  I did; it was the local animal shelter. I came home with a four-week-old motherless kitten, and named her Angel.  Even though I had no intention of adopting a cat that day, Spirit knew different.

“I’m on this mid-life adventure and expanding my creative abilities. The message for this past year is simple:

Be grateful for the gifts life presents and be equally creative in re-shaping for positive outcomes.  Possibility requires a willingness to think and act outside the box – along with faith, listening to Spirit, and trusting the path is always safe and secure.”

If this story doesn’t inspire you to heed your inner wisdom, I don’t know what will.

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Right after I wrote my last post on Letting Go, I had a conversation with my friend, Melanie Greer Deason.  Melanie is a great distance healer (if you want to know how to get in touch with her, contact me and I’ll tell you how—she’s great!).  She’s also a very wise woman.

I told Melanie about how I was manifesting the little stuff but not the big stuff.

“I’m blocked from the money,” I said.

“Oh, don’t say that,” she admonished me.  “Your words have power.  If you say you’re blocked or think you’re blocked, you ARE blocked.”

Duh.  I KNEW that.  But there I was doing it anyway.

“Think of what’s between you and the money you want as a flimsy veil or curtain,” Melanie said, “something that’s obscuring your ability to see what you want but something you can easily move aside to get what you want.”

Of course!

Her words reminded me of something that happened last year.

In March, we bought a memory foam bed and put it on a wood platform Tim built.  It was a lousy bed, and in a couple months, it began breaking down.  We’d gotten it from Costco (I love Costco), so we returned it and got a new memory foam bed–different brand, and we love it.

When the Costco people came to take away the old bed, we discovered a huge moldy wet spot on the mattress and the platform underneath my side of the bed.  YUCK!

I’d been having hot flashes during those three months, and apparently my body heat had made the mattress sweat.  (I’ve since discovered Estroven—highly recommend it; no more hot flashes–if you’re interested, I get the best price at Costco.)

All that time, I’d been sleeping on this big moldy spot and had no idea.  It was right there, just a foot from my butt, and I couldn’t see it.

That incident reminded me that Abraham-Hicks says that 99.9 percent of what we want is completely created before we see evidence of it.  That’s because that much of the creation is done on the nonphysical plane.  So the money I want could be just like that wet, moldy spot—right there, just a foot from me!

Melanie’s right.  There is no block.  There’s just me not yet seeing what I want to see.  And I can choose to move aside the veil that separates me from what I want by deliberately focusing my thoughts on things that make me feel good!

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Yesterday, my friend, Kathy, and I spent a couple hours talking about the law of attraction and what we must do to align with what we want.  One of the aspects of creating your reality that we talked about was letting go of the outcome.

When I look at all the little things I’ve manifested (I just recently started keeping track of them, but literally hundreds of things have come before, including my husband and a bunch of glass fisherman’s floats), I KNOW I’m a powerful creator of my own reality.  I know that the law of attraction is as real as the law of gravity.

But when it comes to the big things, i.e. MONEY, I haven’t had as much luck.  Why?

Attachment.

When I think about little things that I want, I don’t HAVE TO HAVE them.  In fact, in some cases, I don’t even really want them.  I’m just thinking about them.  No attachment to them at all.

When I think about money, I’m totally attached to the outcome.  I really, really, really, really, really (you get the idea) want it.  I can’t honestly say, “Well, I’d really like enough money to continue to live in my home and have a financially free life,” and then say, “But if it doesn’t happen, it’s no big deal.”  It IS a big deal.  I WANT to have plenty of money.

And I think that’s the problem.  I want it too much.

The wanting so much is actually a misalignment.  It indicates that the wanting is more of a longing, which is a feeling of need combined with an acute awareness of the lack of what’s needed.

If I felt like I had all the money I needed, I’d be able to relax about it.  I’d be able to say, “I want more,” but if I don’t get it, it’s no big deal because I feel financially secure now.

That’s a toughie for me.

But I’m working on it.  Instead of letting myself think about what’s coming in 2 months (the reality of the money running out), I am thinking about what we’ll do when we have the financial abundance we want.  And I’m thinking about what I feel inspired to do today.

Today, the universe brought me evidence of the validity of this relaxation/letting go equals alignment theory.  I got easy support for one of the things I felt inspired to do today.  (I put it on the Law of Attraction Evidence page.)

So I’m working on letting go.  I’m working on finding the place of “I don’t have to have money because I feel like I already have it.”

The way I’m doing that is two-fold:

1. I’m following my interests.  If I inspired to do it (however illogical it may seem), I’m doing it.  If it doesn’t appeal to me, I’m not doing it.

2. I’m talking to whoever will listen to me about things that make me happy and what I’m planning to do with my financial freedom. The more I talk, the more financially free I feel.

It’s actually easy to let go when you can convince yourself that you already have what you want.

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I’m just now writing this post because, for the last three days, I’ve been too close to the disappointment to get perspective.

Monday, I got bad news.

I’ve been waiting for several months for my agent to decide whether she wanted to represent my latest manuscript, a young adult novel.  In September, she read it and told me she thought it needed revision because the plot wasn’t as strong as it could be.  She gave me specific suggestions for improving the story and told me to send it to her when I was finished.  I spent the next couple months revamping the plot of not just the manuscript but the synopses of the next three books in the four-book series.

When I sent off the manuscript and synopses, my agent decided to then take her sweet time about getting back to me.  Monday, I finally heard from her.  She e-mailed me that, as usual, she’s impressed with my talent and my commercial instincts, but the manuscript isn’t right for her and she doesn’t want to represent it.

Whoa.

That was a kick in the gut.

Okay, so I’ll admit that I had some doubts lately about whether she was going to take it on.  When an agent doesn’t get to your manuscript for awhile, it’s kind of a code for, “I’m not into you anymore.”  Or maybe my belief in that code is what makes it real.

I got up Monday morning all bright eyed and waggy-tailed.  I took the time to appreciate what was good in my life.  I said out loud, “Today, I will make it my primary intention to find reasons to feel good.”

Ducky and I had a great walk by the bay.  A enjoyed a nice hot shower with the pulsing massage-showerhead that I love.  Ahh.  Life was good.

Then I got the e-mail.  And my intention to feel good got drop-kicked into last week.

Sigh.

Well, as Tim said, she’s only one person and one opinion.

Yeah.  But I was angry.

Not right for her?????

Why didn’t she know that the first time she read it?  Why did she encourage me to jump through all her hoops?  And yes, I asked her … but she’s not taking my calls or e-mails.

Welcome to the world of literary agents.  Not the first time I’ve had a bad experience with one.

So is that why I had another bad experience?  Was my attraction point still the old bad experiences?  Was I subconsciously expecting my agent to act like other ones I’ve had?

I’ll admit that when I got e-mails form her, my stomach often clinched.  Hmm.  That’s a sure sign of misalignment.

And another problem.  I’ve been quite impatient to have my agent get busy submitting the manuscript to editors.  I was aware, with each passing week, that I was STILL waiting.  In other words, I was keeping score.  I was noticing that I didn’t yet have what I wanted.

Abraham-Hicks says:

“You cannot desire something—and notice that it isn’t coming—without offering two contradictory vibrations that won’t let it come”

In other words, when you take score, when you put your attention on the fact that what you want isn’t here yet, the law of attraction will do its work and bring you “it isn’t here yet.”

I guess I should thank my agent for reminding me not to take score.

Now I need to find a new agent and not notice that I’m still waiting to have someone represent my manuscript.

And I need to recommit to feeling good.

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Last weekend, Tim and I watched the movie, Shallow Hal.  It so inspired me to change how I was seeing the world that I decided to start a Feel Good Helpers page to talk about the movies and other media that can help us feel good.

I won’t repeat the plot of the movie here, but the gist of it is that Hal saw a beautiful girl where other people saw a fat girl.  When he fell in love because of what he saw, his life was transformed into what he wanted it to be.

I realized that seeing abundance is exactly the same as seeing beauty.  It doesn’t matter whether it’s really there or not.  If you see it, you feel different.  And if you feel different, you’ll vibrate different.  And if you vibrate different, by the law of attraction, you’ll attract different things into your life … abundant things.

I’ve decided to see MONEY:  all the ways my life reflects financial abundance instead of looking at the ways that it doesn’t.

Sure I have debt.  Sure I get creditor phone calls.  Sure I have dwindling resources.  Yadda, yadda, yadda.  NI!

But I have a wonderful home.  I have beautiful things to look at.  I have a wonderful Springer Spaniel.  I have two cars.  I have appliances that do the things I need them to do.  I have clothing.  I can buy groceries.  I can pay my bills right now.

What will happen if I keep my attention on this evidence of financial abundance instead of the “reality” of lack?

I don’t know.  But I’m going to find out.

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“Don’t toot your own horn,” my mother always told me.

Translation:  don’t be too full of yourself, don’t be too proud of yourself, don’t pat yourself on the back too much, don’t brag, don’t be overconfident … etc., etc., etc.

We don’t much like people who extol their own virtues.  We much prefer people who speak in woundology or people who are self-deprecating.

Why don’t we call each other up and crow over our triumphs?  Why don’t we speak joyfully about the great night’s sleep we got or the cute dog we saw playing in the park?  Why don’t we give ourselves credit for all the things we do everyday, even if they’re so-called ordinary things that everyone does?  Isn’t it an accomplishment to brush and floss your teeth, exercise, hold a door open for someone, or smile at a stranger?  Why don’t we talk about these things?

Because if we do, people think we’re weird.  They think we’re self-centered, way too pleased with ourselves.

The only time we get to exult in the wonder of our life is when it’s a really big deal—a new job, a new lover, a lottery win.  Even then, we can only talk about it so much before people think we’re being obnoxious.

I’ve decided it would be a lot easier for us all to feel good if we celebrated each others’ happy moments more often.  I think we all need to toot our horns as much as possible.  We need to toot and toot and toot!

We might want to start with people we feel really safe with first. I’m starting with my husband, Tim.  He understands alignment, creating your own reality, finding a feel good place so you line up with what you want.  So he gets that I’m tooting my horn because I want to put my attention on what’s good.

I’m going to tell some friends about it too (those who read this blog, consider yourself forewarned).  I’m saying, “I’m going to be exulting a lot.  Get used to it.”

Will it change my life?  Who knows?  That’s what this experiment is all about.

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In her book, Why People Don’t Heal and How They Can, best-selling author and medical intuitive Caroline Myss, talks about the power that lies in being wounded.

“One day, in passing, I introduced a friend of mine to two gentlemen I was talking with,” says Myss in her book. “Within two minutes, my friend managed to let these men know that she was an incest survivor. Her admission had nothing whatsoever to do with the conversation we’d been having, and in a flash I realized that she was using her wounds as leverage. She had gotten to the point that she defined herself by a negative experience.”

Once Myss became attuned to this phenomenon, which she dubbed woundology, she saw it everywhere. “In workshops and in daily life I saw that, rather than working to get beyond their wounds, people were using them as social currency,” says Myss. “They were confusing the therapeutic value of self-expression with permission to manipulate others with their wounds. Who would want to leave that behind? Health never commands so much clout!”

Have you ever noticed how we lead with what’s wrong?  People ask how you are, and you tell them about your latest illness or injury or “horrible” experience.  They immediately respond with their latest injury or problem.

I get this everyday from my mom.  She delights in telling me about the latest physical ailments that have been visited upon her or my dad.  She tells me about every little thing that has gone wrong.  These stories usually start with, “Oh, yesterday, we had a horrible experience.” These “horrible” experiences can range from getting a phone call that awakens them to having a deer in their backyard that’s having trouble figuring out how to get back out over the fence to getting bad service in a restaurant.

Of course, I speak fluent woundology too (most everyone does).

I speak it less than I used to though.  Many years ago, I stopped saying, “I’m depressed” or “I’m bipolar” or “I have an eating disorder.”  I began giving up the labels that were essentially badges for my wounds.

But I didn’t give up woundology completely.  Now, I’ve decided to reject the language.

Why do I need to tell someone about how my sinuses are stuffed up because of something blooming in my yard?  Who needs to know about my ankle pain?  My financial mess?  My struggles with food?  Etc.  Etc.  Etc.

There’s always something good going on.  My new intention is to ALWAYS find something good to say when people ask, “How are you?”

And if someone speaks woundology to me, I’ll listen, smiling and nodding, the way people who can’t understand a language do when they don’t have a clue what someone is saying to them.  I will not respond in kind.

It’s resolves like this, I’m convinced, that are going to make it possible for me to finally stick with this experiment.  Think about it.  If we’re talking about bad things, what is the law of attraction going to bring to us?  Bad things, of course.

Woundology puts us on a vibrational match with more wounds.  Who wants that?

I sure don’t.  So I’m talking about the good stuff!

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I’ve decided to start a list of the little things I manifest by focusing on them or talking about them.  Instead of sticking these things in posts here and there, I’ve create a new page,  Law of Attraction Evidence, so I’ll have all these goodies on one page.

This is going to be a fun list to make.  And I’m sure it will help me continue to feel good.  If you’re noticing the little things you’re manifesting, please share them in the comments on the Law of Attraction Evidence page.  Let’s help each other see how well this create your reality stuff works!

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Earlier this week, I was poking around the internet looking to see if anyone else out there is testing Abraham-Hicks teachings.  I came across an e-how article that suggested you test the law of attraction by trying to manifest a blue feather.

I think this is profoundly silly and lousy advice.  Yes, some guy in The Secret manifested a distinctive feather, so I get inspiration for the idea.

But you’re not so much testing the law of attraction as you’re testing your ability to align with something.  And it’s difficult to get excited about something you don’t really want all that much.  The good feelings required to achieve alignment with a desire come from the exuberant expectation of fulfilling the desire.  I don’t know about you—but blue feathers don’t do that much for me.

I’d rather focus on something I really want.  Because I have resistance I need to work through on the subjects of the lottery, selling my latest books, etc., I’m going for something I feel a little more relaxed about:  manifesting $2000.  I’m starting there.

I’m thinking about how fun it will be to start to see myself matching up with my desires, and $2000 is a good place to start.

I think if we’re going to test our ability to manifest things, we should pick something we really want, and if we need to start small, fine, but we should still make it something we want.

Want to try it yourself?  Pick some little thing you’d like and think about how great it will be to have it.  Then make it your priority to find reasons to feel good.

Let me know what happens.

Wouldn’t it be great if we could all become what Abraham-Hicks calls Deliberate Creators?

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